Time to find closure

It was a weird kind of afternoon. After lunch with some friends at Yummy Claypot at Joo Chiat, I walked towards the bus stop, homeward.

I site Katong Catholic Bookshop. It was a place that I have wanted to step into, not too far away from home, but never did get a chance to go in. Instead, I usually go to Carlo Catholic Society all the way in town (Queen Street).

As I walked into the shop, I was very conscious of being the only customer in the shop. I slowly browsed through each and every shelf of books. Then I saw this whole shelf of books on Catholics and divorce. It was like God had asked me to go there. As cliche as it may sound, it was like He wanted me to find some more of my own answers. I got two books and was so tempted to buy yet another rosary, but I stopped myself. I must say though, they may have less selection of rosaries than Carlo, but they have really nice ones.

In the evening, instead of watching tv, I decided to continue tidying the cupboard full of stuff from my old house and old office. As I was deciding between which to throw and which to keep, I chanced upon the photos I took with two colleagues on my wedding day. I chanced upon the well-wishers' cards, I chanced upon the mass booklet that were printed and given out on that day (I still kept a few) and I chanced upon the picture of the chihuahua that I had to give away (back to my ex).

It brought me back to a time when I was happy and then not so happy and I fast forwarded it to the time right now. It also reminded me that I have not yet filed for divorce, that I had been procrastinating, even though a large part of it is more so because of his parents and not him.

It did not help that V day is coming. I have been skipping all those lovey-dovey advertisements and promotional emails. I don't have the strength to any feelings towards V day anymore; be it hurt, sorry, angry, lonely, whatsoever.

Then I chanced upon some computer floppy disks. Not the really big, floppy ones but the more stylish ones that by now is also obsolete. I had wanted to keep them all, as there was information in there, but like the past, it is pointless. As the information cannot be extracted anymore (unless I go through lots of trouble).

Just like the disks that I decided to throw away, it is time that I find closure to my long estranged marriage. I will start communicating with the lawyer after the 15th day of Chinese New Year, just in case the lawyer is 'pantang' (superstitious) and doesn't want to start the year with such cases. Hee!